Piracy in the Gulf of Aden is the new scourge of the high seas, at least according to those who don’t profit from it. That incorrigible diplomat, John Bolton, has suggested a “coalition of the willing” invade Somalia. Will he ever learn? Can you say Black Hawk Down?

Make no mistake about it: piracy is extremely lucrative for the pirates, who made $80 million last year in ransom, according to experts. And the pirates love it. But then, who wouldn’t? Daring deeds carried out at the barrel of an automatic weapon, spiffy uniforms, and camaraderie forged in the red hot kiln of battle.

What does “carrot and stick” mean? Your response might reveal something about how you approach the world (or perhaps, only about your education). Today, carrot and stick typically refers to reward and punishment employed to persuade another.

Carrots entice, while sticks threaten, or so runs this adage’s popular interpretation. Its etymology, however, is contested. Most believe the origin lies in dangling a carrot on a stick in front of, for example, a donkey to encourage movement.

Two events this week compel me to engage again that fundamental moral question facing all so-called “civilized societies”: Who should we kill? Senators sent back to committee a bill repealing Kansas’ capital punishment law, and jury selection began for Dr. George Tiller’s misdemeanor trial.

One need only mention Tiller’s name to evoke the (often pejorative) epithet, “late-term abortion.” Typically applied incorrectly to mid-term abortions, when describing Tiller’s Women’s Health Care Services, the moniker is not only appropriate, but celebrated by them.

Hays, Kansas, lost a great soul last week, and I lost a dear friend. Donald “Duck” Smith died at home with his loving family. He smoked most of his life and suffered dreadful consequences: chronic obstructive pulmonary disease, emphysema, and bouts of pneumonia.

Don’s life stands as both a cautionary tale and beacon of hope. The real loss, of course, is to his family. They were devoted to his care, fiercely protective and strong advocates. They upended their lives to make sure he received everything he needed, except another lease on life.

I am honored to call Don Smith my friend.

“Murdering the innocent to advance an ideology is wrong every time, everywhere,” or so saith former-President Bush in his farewell address last week. Honestly George, are you out of your mind? Murdering the innocent to advance ideology literally defines your Presidency.

What many in America find to be self-evident is anathema to other cultures and beliefs. Contrary to popular neo-conservative folklore, democratic capitalism does not spell the “end of history,” nor does it represent the apotheosis of human community.

“It was the best of times, it was the worst of times.” Dickens’ A Tale of Two Cities documents aristocratic and revolutionary discontent, as any schoolchild knows. (Before the criticism begins, my tale is Dickensian only in inspiration.)

The two “cities” considered are Haze, America and Gaza City. I hope to use discontent in both to elucidate my own morality play. The division facing each varies considerably, almost so much one might question the comparison.

‘Tis the season for holiday cheer, with blessings to most. Fortunately, column length and good sense prevent me from proffering to all who rightly deserve greetings (or jeers). The spirit doth overtake us in decidedly different ways. One’s succor is another’s poison.

To combatants and noncombatants alike who spend your holidays in battle zones this year, may you find peace of mind, physical safety and a quantum of solace despite your vagarious situations, and may those who hold your and your family's fate find kindness and compassion.

With all due apologies (and massive respect) to Theodor Seuss Geisel, the Grinch legend desperately needs revision -- apologies also to my beautiful son, who is a huge Dr. Seuss fan and, as he explained to me yesterday, is suffused with the Christmas spirit.

Everyone down in America liked Christmas a lot ... but Green Grinch, who lived just north, did not! Green Grinch hated its conspicuous consumption, obscene commercialism and irresponsible materialism.

He lived at the North Pole and had grown quite fond of jolly Saint Nick. Green Grinch understood well why his southern neighbors loved Christmas so. His sour, Grinchy frown had long ago warmed to the lighted windows below.

The Freedom of Choice Act was introduced in 1989 to codify Roe v. Wade. I wonder if its opponents have actually read it.

I support reproductive rights for women (and men). Since I couldn't understand the full implications of deciding about one's pregnancy, I always believed the decision was not mine to make. My conclusion was as unsatisfying to me as it was personally correct.

Congratulations to Crawford, Douglas and Wyandotte counties in Kansas for their righteous choice in Tuesday's election and to the nearly 500,000 Kansans who saw fit to help elect the next great president (despite my endorsement). Ah, democracy, sweet democracy!

Whether this historic event reflects a sea shift in America's virulent history of racism remains to be seen. If the pathetic reaction to Sen. John McCain's classy concession speech by his immediate audience in Arizona is any indication, there is much work still to do.

Nonetheless, President-elect Barack Obama's overwhelming victory provides him with a strong mandate for his ambitious agenda.