First, the term gay, in and of itself, is not a hateful term. Most homosexuals I know will not be angered if you identify them as "gay". In fact, for the vast majority, they prefer to use the term "gay" over terms such as "homo", "queer", or any number of more hurtful words. However, this is not the spirit in which it is used by the common usage, such as the young man coming out of the test.

When the term "gay" is used as a synonym for "stupid", it becomes something else entirely. By accepting the frequent interchanging of these words, the speaker, and, by extension, the listener, becomes an agent of the homophobic culture that dominates the majority of the United States today. When the terms "gay" and "stupid" mean the same thing, then how do we say that we truly accept homosexuality, or the gay community, into our society as our equals? If the word used to identify they homosexual community is the same as the word used to describe all things "stupid" in our culture, what does that say about our feelings for homosexuals?

While this is one of the more frequent ways that I find language used in this manner, it is not, by any means, the only one. How many times have we heard a non-athletic young man told that he "throws like a girl"? (Frankly, if you've ever seen the amazingly talented softball pitcher Jennie Finch throw, I wish I could throw like that "girl".) There is the frequent usage of terms like "be a man", "don't be a girl", and "man up" which are similar examples of the same phenomenon. I refuse to even mention some of the most offensive examples of this type of misuse of language, as it disgusts me to even think of them, and I know that you get my point.

The most frequent argument that you get when calling somebody out on their use of language in this manner is that it isn't hurting anybody. However, this is obviously not the case. Think of a young homosexual who has heard the words "gay" and "stupid" used synonymously for their entire life. Do you honestly think that isn't going to have some effect on their psyche? Is it beyond the realm of possibility that they might, in fact, have some self esteem issues based on that? Think of it for young females brought up in a society that equates being a "girl" to being weak and incapable of standing up for yourself. Then ask yourself if nobody is truly getting hurt.

The wonderful thing about language is that well chosen words have the ability to change the world. "I have a dream.." "Ask not what your country can do for you..." "Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful people could change the world. Indeed, it's the only thing that ever has." These phrases are proof that words matter. Words change the paradigm. Words shift perceptions. How, then, when presented with such evidence that language can effect the very foundation of this country, can we ever stand idly by and listen to them take away the power of entire groups of people?