I saw the news yesterday that James Dobson, of Focus on the Family infamy, has called for FoF supporters to go to California next week in order to pray and fast for the passage of Proposition 8 -- and passage will take away the right to marry. And I cried.

I wasn't upset by James Dobson's call -- I no longer put any degree of cruelty past that man. I was upset because I was once a supporter of FoF and I know what power he holds. I was once part of a church community that was staunchly anti-choice, anti-woman, and anti-gay. I cannot say that the community was filled with hatred toward those who embrace choice, feminism, or LGBT equality -- they weren't. I found a home in that church. But members of the church were convinced by ministers like Dobson to take up a very narrow slate of issues and causes to fight -- "moral issues," Dobson and others call them.

What upset me today is that good people -- people of faith -- all over the country are going to go against their norms of decency and love, and will take up banners of inequality. They will fight to write discrimination into a state constitution. They will take away rights that have already been granted to their neighbors, co-workers, and family members who are gay.

I was once part of that group... until I realized that I'm gay. That wasn't an existential crisis for me -- it was much more of an existential crisis to realize that I'm agnostic than that I'm gay. And I don't hate the church, or its members -- for some in the LGBT community, that's the only way they know how to respond to the church's stances on some of these "moral issues." Rather, I think the church is one of the few gateways to a really progressive shift in this country. It is when the church comes around to the "just side" of an issue that change really happens. That's why I was so upset by Dobson's digging in of heels -- I don't remotely believe that Dobson represents the church writ large. But I do believe that he has an enormous amount of influence on a certain sliver of the church -- and it breaks my heart that they will be traveling to California for the sole purpose of taking away rights that have been granted by the government.

There are all kinds of reasons to vote No on Prop 8. Because it's taking away a right already given away. Because it's writing discrimination into the state constitution. Because it's bad for business. Or simply because we're better than this.

I'm heading to California tomorrow and will be working with the good people at the No on Prop 8 campaign to ensure that the Dobsons of the world do not triumph. I'll have more to post from there. But, in the meantime, what do YOU think? What are YOUR experiences with Focus on the Family and other similar groups? And what are YOUR thoughts on the choices we have ahead of us on November 4?