Republican VP candidate Sarah Palin returned last night from a visit to Eastern Europe designed to enhance her foreign policy credentials. Ms. Palin met last Monday with Premier Igor Rubberducky of the Republic of Dumbshitiskan. On the one day visit to the capital city of Garbitch,the American VP wannabe was able to observe the Dumbshitiskanian house of delegates vote on the crucial issue of cow manure disposal, a very controversial issue in the former Soviet Republic, as farmers have demanded that cow manure be dropped in front of the Premier's home. Ms. Palin, flashing her now famous smile, said that she felt right at home, "I just love all this bullshit, don't ya?"
After the meeting in the city of Garbitch, Ms Palin took a mule ride over the rugged mountains of Eastern Dumbshitiskan, into Poland, and visited the Village of Krakked, where she received a warm and cordial welcome from the Mayor, Ignatz Kornflakesky.
Mr. Kornflakesky, an ardent Palin admirer, even provided her with an opportunity to enhance her debating skills by having the village idiot debate her on the world wide consequences of moose hunting and Igloo building. Word has it that Las Vegas odds makers actually gave 2 to 1 odds that Palin would win. The jury is still out who really won but the village idiot has had two marriage proposals and was given a free subscription to the local newspaper "The Zoink."
Shortly after her return to the US, Ms. Palin was spirited away by a harried looking John McCain to an undisclosed location where she will remain, rumor has it, with her mouth taped shut, until her debate with Senator Biden Thursday night.
Contributing to this report are C.C. Nouel in Blabb Texas, Waldo Nutt in Washington DC, and Bernice Garbanzo-Bean in Cognito, North Dakota.